black friday

Let me start by saying Happy Thanksgiving.  I sort of missed it this week because I was too busy enjoying the company of family and friends.  We had a beautiful turkey dinner complete with cranberry stuffing, green beans, and mashed potatoes.  Then there was dessert, let’s not even go there.  My tummy is still recovering.

We had a wonderful day, filled with catching up, discussing babies, and the biggest knitting needles I’ve ever seen (more to come on this one later).  I am so thankful for my family, my friends, my yarn stash, my creative impulses, my techie husband, my adorable pink twirly daughter, the gigantic lump in my abdomen that will eventually be my son, and the fact that I don’t want for anything.  We are in a house that keeps us warm and safe.  I have enough clothes to wear and movies to watch.  We live in a town that has a beach.  We have family that takes care of us, feeds us occasionally, tells us great stories, and loves us very much.  All in all, a very thankful day.

Friday however, was a very roller coaster day. One of those really big ones with loops and upside down bits. After almost a week of waiting (plus a few months too) Donut decided it’s time.  My water broke that morning and after a call to the midwife, she sent us to the hospital in the afternoon.

When Miss R was born, there wasn’t much time to really think about the whole labor process.  With this guy, I’m going to need some help, seeing as how I’m not having contractions yet.  I’m worried about how long and painful it’s going to be, plus I already know what’s going to happen to my body once he arrives.  ugh.

But then I think about how wonderful it’s going to be having another little baby in the house.  I think about how great it’s going to be having 2 children to love and cuddle and watch grow up.

Then, there’s the absolutely mixed blessing which arrived in my mailbox about a half hour after talking to the midwife.  I’ve been laid off from teaching.  It seems that when there’s a budget crunch, art isn’t on the top of the list of keepers.  So, I now have quite a bit of time to be a stay at home mom.

My first reaction was tears. Hey, I’d just gotten off the phone with the midwife telling us to head to the hospital, and then I get this letter.  Can we really survive with another person if I’m not working?

As it has really settled in, I’ve decided that I’m not really upset over losing my job.  I didn’t get fired because I’m a bad teacher.  Rather, I’m in a very specialized profession that is definitely on the border of what is deemed necessary by the state (Please don’t jump all over me, I know the arts are important in childrens lives, I do, but I also know that if they had to let go of a teacher, it wasn’t going to be the 2nd grade teacher with 26 students). What really got to me was that it wasn’t my choice.

I’ve been pondering being a stay at home mom for some time now.  It would be wonderful to watch my children and be here with them.  We can do so much.  All the fun activities that we have to smash in on weekends can now be done leisurely throughout the week.  Instead of coming home frazzled from nearly 100 students needing my attention, I can have just 2 children who need my attention.

With that kind of stress, there was no way Donut was coming on his own. After 4 hours at the hospital, they decided that my little leak wasn’t too bad, and the alternative was to induce me at 9 pm on a Friday. The midwife sent me home to wait for more contractions, or else Monday’s appointment, whichever came first. On Monday, we will decide whether we should induce this week in order to meet Donut, or if we let him (and me) wait it out. I’d like to say I’m going to let Mama Nature take this one over and just wait til he’s ready, but I think I’m ready to be done with the sore belly, and a week and a half of contractions.

Will keep everyone updated on the status of our little one and on the new adventure that awaits all of us as I learn a new profession.

One thought on “black friday

  1. Wow, that’s a lot of change all at once! Good luck with the stay at home Mom thing… I hear there are lots of blogs about it. Hope that Donut arrives soon!

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